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Don't Mean To (DC comics) i.e., yes, fanfiction after the long hiatus
This is all Te's fault. By which I mean, thanks to ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
thete1 for inspiration; to monkeycrackmary, petronelle and thete1 for audiencing; and to brown_betty for a frustrating (for her) beta.
Title taken from the song "Redwing" by Dan Messe, which, again,thete1. (Someday, I will hear this song, instead of just reading the lyrics.)
Contains themes some readers may find disturbing, but no explicit or violent language. Is safe for my mother (though not necessarily yours) to read.
Still with me? Okay, story.
Don't Mean To
It isn't that Tim's in a hurry to get back to the cave. He's just having *fun*.
Being Robin is amazing, everything Tim never dared to aspire to his whole life, even after Jason proved you didn't have to be Dick Grayson to be Robin. Even all the months he worked harder than he would've thought he was capable of, consciously striving to prove that he was worthy of it, hadn't quite taken all of the sheen of unreality off it. Tim was Robin. Tim *is* Robin.
*Robin*.
But on the other hand, he'd had all those months to get used to the idea that the suit would be his. The Redbird is something else entirely.
He'd never asked, and Bruce had never suggested anything, either, about his getting his own vehicle. It was unprecedented, really: Dick and Jason had had their own motorcycles, when they were old enough (for varying definitions of 'old enough') but Tim had had every reason to expect to be in the passenger seat of the Batmobile most nights once he was cleared for active duty.
The Redbird was a complete surprise -- Tim hadn't even known Bruce was having a new vehicle built -- and he's still not over the heady rush of his own Robinmobile. Being able to gun it down deserted stretches of straightaway in the pre-dawn hours accomplishes the exact opposite of dampening that thrill, that elation.
His headlights pick out a shape in the road ahead, and he has just exactly enough time to slow down and maybe need to swerve to avoid hitting it -- he hopes -- he prays --
--He winds up not needing to decide which way to swerve, or whether to attempt a full stop, because the shape slips off the road. Upwards.
Tim continues slowing down, and reviews his memory of the last few not-quite-panicked seconds, and assigns a tentative identification to the shape. And pulls off onto an access road, slowing down even more.
He pulls over and kills the Redbird's lights as soon as he's out of sight of the road, and Superman is touching down next to him even as he's getting out of his car.
"What is--" it, he starts to ask, then realises that's a bit abrupt; but "What's wrong" could seem rude in a different way, and Superman is *staring* at him, and... Tim realises *he's* staring and clears his throat and starts over. "Superman?"
"Evening, Robin," Superman says, and then... Tim is tempted to construe Superman's body language as nervous, even uncomfortable, but that doesn't make sense--
Tim considers. Maybe--
"I..." Maybe Superman really is uncomfortable. It's impossible to tell in the dark, but his body language suggests he might be blushing. "I wanted to talk to you."
"Of course," Tim says, and his voice is gratifyingly steady even as his mind is racing. He touches the door of the Redbird behind him with one hand to remind himself that he's standing still. He waits.
"I wanted to. Ask you." Superman is looking at the ground, or possibly at Tim's boots, which is reasonable because tabi have never been part of the Robin uniform before and his are black to, er, boot.
"Yes."
"When -- Did you -- How long have you... known."
And Superman's arms are folded across his chest, but the effect is more defensive than intimidating, and Tim's pretty sure that's all Superman is going to say.
Okay, Tim -- Robin -- here's your big chance. Detect. But it's really more a matter of ruling out other possibilities, and that doesn't take long.
"You overheard one of the conversations about... my previous hobby. My collection."
"I-- yes."
Tim takes a moment to decide how to phrase his answer. Then he glances back at Superman, and something in his posture makes Tim's mouth open and the words just pour out. "I couldn't get to Metropolis often, and you were rarely in Gotham except on business, and there was only one time when I happened to be in Metropolis at the right time *and* the right place."
Superman's eyes blaze at him. They seem to be actually glowing in the dark. Tim straightens up so that his cape falls closed in front of him, just in case.
Tim swallows.
"Go on." Tim never knew Superman could sound hoarse. Or possibly it's just the pulse roaring in Tim's ears making him seem to.
"Once I had... observed data to reference, it became fairly easy to extrapolate other... encounters from subtler cues in your meetings in Gotham." And Metropolis. And, later, New York. Tim doesn't think it's necessary to go into that much detail.
Superman nods, and looks at the ground again, and frowns and descends the couple of inches to the ground. His feet make a faint rustling sound against the leaf litter at the side of the gravel road.
Tim waits, and checks to make sure he isn't shivering or hyperventilating or going into shock; he isn't. He's freaking out quite mildly, really, considering the circumstances.
"Does he-- does Batman know?" Superman asks after a long moment.
It had never even occurred to Tim that he might not, and he does have a moment of panic before he can recall precisely what photos he'd taken, as opposed to what he merely remembers. "I... I don't believe so," he says, slowly. "There's no... unambiguous photographic evidence in my archive."
Just lots of friendly, pal-around contact. And many pointed looks. Some looks that could be construed as heated.
Not all of them had been directed at Dick.
And... it seems like he has a right to ask, now, if perhaps not necessarily to know.
"May I... ask you something?'
Superman nods, though his mouth is a taut arc of frown.
"Were... that is, I -- Did you and... Jason... ever..."
"No," Superman says, immediately. And he's smiling, now, for all that it's somewhere between rueful and regretful, clear enough to read even in the wood-shadowed night.
"But you--"
"If he had returned my interest," Superman says, and it's the easiest words have seemed to come for him since the conversation began.
Tim nods, and for a moment it feels quite literally as if he can't get his mind in gear to think, like those few times he didn't engage the clutch quite right in the Redbird, weeks ago. Then the image of Dick gasping, clutching at Superman's back, seems to fill his vision.
Tim forces himself to focus on Superman, on the way Superman is looking at him. Not just expectant. There's something... something he recognises, there. And--
There's a question hanging unspoken between them. The one that's been there all along, if he's viciously honest with himself.
"I... I believe I'll need time to consider. But... well. Everything about Robins *interests* me, Superman."
"Something, perhaps, that we have in common." Superman's smile is one he's seen before, many times... just never focussed on him. It's familiar in a way that's frightening and soothing all at once.
Tim smiles back. And holds out his hand.
*
I want more fanfiction about characters like these by you, Jack
I want more stories by the Jack, and I'm not picky about fandoms
thete1 for inspiration; to monkeycrackmary, petronelle and thete1 for audiencing; and to brown_betty for a frustrating (for her) beta.Title taken from the song "Redwing" by Dan Messe, which, again,
thete1. (Someday, I will hear this song, instead of just reading the lyrics.)Contains themes some readers may find disturbing, but no explicit or violent language. Is safe for my mother (though not necessarily yours) to read.
Still with me? Okay, story.
Don't Mean To
It isn't that Tim's in a hurry to get back to the cave. He's just having *fun*.
Being Robin is amazing, everything Tim never dared to aspire to his whole life, even after Jason proved you didn't have to be Dick Grayson to be Robin. Even all the months he worked harder than he would've thought he was capable of, consciously striving to prove that he was worthy of it, hadn't quite taken all of the sheen of unreality off it. Tim was Robin. Tim *is* Robin.
*Robin*.
But on the other hand, he'd had all those months to get used to the idea that the suit would be his. The Redbird is something else entirely.
He'd never asked, and Bruce had never suggested anything, either, about his getting his own vehicle. It was unprecedented, really: Dick and Jason had had their own motorcycles, when they were old enough (for varying definitions of 'old enough') but Tim had had every reason to expect to be in the passenger seat of the Batmobile most nights once he was cleared for active duty.
The Redbird was a complete surprise -- Tim hadn't even known Bruce was having a new vehicle built -- and he's still not over the heady rush of his own Robinmobile. Being able to gun it down deserted stretches of straightaway in the pre-dawn hours accomplishes the exact opposite of dampening that thrill, that elation.
His headlights pick out a shape in the road ahead, and he has just exactly enough time to slow down and maybe need to swerve to avoid hitting it -- he hopes -- he prays --
--He winds up not needing to decide which way to swerve, or whether to attempt a full stop, because the shape slips off the road. Upwards.
Tim continues slowing down, and reviews his memory of the last few not-quite-panicked seconds, and assigns a tentative identification to the shape. And pulls off onto an access road, slowing down even more.
He pulls over and kills the Redbird's lights as soon as he's out of sight of the road, and Superman is touching down next to him even as he's getting out of his car.
"What is--" it, he starts to ask, then realises that's a bit abrupt; but "What's wrong" could seem rude in a different way, and Superman is *staring* at him, and... Tim realises *he's* staring and clears his throat and starts over. "Superman?"
"Evening, Robin," Superman says, and then... Tim is tempted to construe Superman's body language as nervous, even uncomfortable, but that doesn't make sense--
Tim considers. Maybe--
"I..." Maybe Superman really is uncomfortable. It's impossible to tell in the dark, but his body language suggests he might be blushing. "I wanted to talk to you."
"Of course," Tim says, and his voice is gratifyingly steady even as his mind is racing. He touches the door of the Redbird behind him with one hand to remind himself that he's standing still. He waits.
"I wanted to. Ask you." Superman is looking at the ground, or possibly at Tim's boots, which is reasonable because tabi have never been part of the Robin uniform before and his are black to, er, boot.
"Yes."
"When -- Did you -- How long have you... known."
And Superman's arms are folded across his chest, but the effect is more defensive than intimidating, and Tim's pretty sure that's all Superman is going to say.
Okay, Tim -- Robin -- here's your big chance. Detect. But it's really more a matter of ruling out other possibilities, and that doesn't take long.
"You overheard one of the conversations about... my previous hobby. My collection."
"I-- yes."
Tim takes a moment to decide how to phrase his answer. Then he glances back at Superman, and something in his posture makes Tim's mouth open and the words just pour out. "I couldn't get to Metropolis often, and you were rarely in Gotham except on business, and there was only one time when I happened to be in Metropolis at the right time *and* the right place."
Superman's eyes blaze at him. They seem to be actually glowing in the dark. Tim straightens up so that his cape falls closed in front of him, just in case.
Tim swallows.
"Go on." Tim never knew Superman could sound hoarse. Or possibly it's just the pulse roaring in Tim's ears making him seem to.
"Once I had... observed data to reference, it became fairly easy to extrapolate other... encounters from subtler cues in your meetings in Gotham." And Metropolis. And, later, New York. Tim doesn't think it's necessary to go into that much detail.
Superman nods, and looks at the ground again, and frowns and descends the couple of inches to the ground. His feet make a faint rustling sound against the leaf litter at the side of the gravel road.
Tim waits, and checks to make sure he isn't shivering or hyperventilating or going into shock; he isn't. He's freaking out quite mildly, really, considering the circumstances.
"Does he-- does Batman know?" Superman asks after a long moment.
It had never even occurred to Tim that he might not, and he does have a moment of panic before he can recall precisely what photos he'd taken, as opposed to what he merely remembers. "I... I don't believe so," he says, slowly. "There's no... unambiguous photographic evidence in my archive."
Just lots of friendly, pal-around contact. And many pointed looks. Some looks that could be construed as heated.
Not all of them had been directed at Dick.
And... it seems like he has a right to ask, now, if perhaps not necessarily to know.
"May I... ask you something?'
Superman nods, though his mouth is a taut arc of frown.
"Were... that is, I -- Did you and... Jason... ever..."
"No," Superman says, immediately. And he's smiling, now, for all that it's somewhere between rueful and regretful, clear enough to read even in the wood-shadowed night.
"But you--"
"If he had returned my interest," Superman says, and it's the easiest words have seemed to come for him since the conversation began.
Tim nods, and for a moment it feels quite literally as if he can't get his mind in gear to think, like those few times he didn't engage the clutch quite right in the Redbird, weeks ago. Then the image of Dick gasping, clutching at Superman's back, seems to fill his vision.
Tim forces himself to focus on Superman, on the way Superman is looking at him. Not just expectant. There's something... something he recognises, there. And--
There's a question hanging unspoken between them. The one that's been there all along, if he's viciously honest with himself.
"I... I believe I'll need time to consider. But... well. Everything about Robins *interests* me, Superman."
"Something, perhaps, that we have in common." Superman's smile is one he's seen before, many times... just never focussed on him. It's familiar in a way that's frightening and soothing all at once.
Tim smiles back. And holds out his hand.
*
I want more fanfiction about characters like these by you, Jack
I want more stories by the Jack, and I'm not picky about fandoms
no subject
the last two paragraphs gave me the *shivers*.
this is a fascinating/creepifying/wonderful/ican'tquitedecideuponanadjective exploration both of Clark's Robin kink and some of the more, er, unexplored-by-canon consquences of Tim's detecting skills.
thanks so much for sharing.
no subject
The intersection of Clark's fascination with Robins and Tim's skill at stalking is an interesting place which I'm sure could be explored further...
no subject
Yay! for Robinosexuals! And Robins! And Clark being a huge perv!
no subject
I firmly believe there's a giant perv behind Clark's wholesome, all-American image.
no subject
This sounds *just* like early!Tim!Robin, and Superman is... well, the Superman who'd have a thing with Dick, and not with Jason, and who'd be... intrigued by Tim, as a matter of course.
I wonder what were Tim's thoughts during that part of his stalking of Dick?
In conclusion, Wow.
no subject
I wonder what went through Tim's mind when he was watching certain of Dick's activities back then, myself, but stalkerboy plays his hand close to his chest. Er... so to speak.
(You changed your default icon?? But... but where's Cass?)
no subject
I... am weak against evil bald geniuses? And also, this has been the month of "Fuck, What Else Can Go Wrong *Now*?", so I'm protesting by changing my default icon from "I hate this day"-Cass to "Happy Evil Genius"-Eddie.
*shrugs* It's worth a try, anyway. And Cass is still in my puny free iconset, for those days *g*.
no subject
Thankfully, the only Tim canon I actually own *is* Breyfogle!Tim.
So that solved that.
"You overheard one of the conversations about... my previous hobby. My collection."
. . . collection. Meep.
Superman's smile is one he's seen before, many times... just never focussed on him. It's familiar in a way that's frightening and soothing all at once.
Tim smiles back. And holds out his hand.
ggdhlghag.orvbfuQLIjlHBCDJBLjvhjbghbn
Dear Clark: Your viewpoints intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter. That said, don't ever let me catch you looking at Tim like that again.
Also: with a title like "Redbird," please say you've got a link to those lyrics handy, please.
no subject
no subject
Tim's 'collection' is, I remind you, canon.
And, since you asked so italicisedly, here are your lyrics:
Redwing
Hey, was that you floating past the tree-line?
Hey, was that a feather in your hand?
No I don't mean to ask these questions
No I don't mean to rush your heart
I swear I saw this accidentally
No I don't mean to start
Hey, the rain falls straight into the sidewalk
Hey, the clouds hang heavy in the sky
But I don't want to still believe in
The gravity of solid ground
The world below is not so big
That it can keep us down
We are standing on the rooftops
We are circling like sparrows
We are tiny, we are trembling,
Scared of everything
But the heart is still a red wing
Fly above the houses and the schoolyards
And fly until you cannot feel the Earth
No I don't mean that it's so easy
And I don't mean that it's so small
But the world below is not so mean
That it can make us fall
We are standing on the rooftops
We are circling like sparrows
We are tiny, we are trembling,
Scared of everything
But the heart is still a red wing
(Te pointed out that the song was *performed* by a band called Hem.)
no subject
Because I'm an idiot it took me awhile to figure out who Clark had been involved with (who was Tim stalking, at least to begin with, after all). And then I began to squeak. And then the last line made me stuff my fists in my mouth and scream.
(Also, what *happened* to the Redbird in all its fast car glory? I want to write about it, but I can't till I know how it died.)
no subject
Possibly I spend too much time talking about Tim/Clark with Te, but I was surprised by people's EEK-type reactions to the end of this. (Which is ambiguous, I promise. They could just be shaking hands goodbye. Seriously.) It's the beginning of a beautiful friendship. Or something.
no subject
fanwanked excusescharacterization support to write it). I think what made me personally eek, though, is that this *is* a Tim who actually considers human matters such as enjoyment, but he doesn't seem to wrt Clark's Robinosexuality. He seems to be thinking along the lines of "well, if Robin's been involved with Clark well then..." Not resignedly, but not eagerly, either. Just... Timmishly. *Robinishly*Am I making sense?
I'd say more (such as a detailed yay at your return) but here comes the Headmaster!
no subject
no subject
Ver' nice!
(Anonymous) 2005-12-05 07:15 am (UTC)(link)And the mutual hobby of interest.
I like!
--Darth Nonie
no subject
::dances around you:: Where's your LJ?? I wanna go give you icons and comment on your posts and stuff.
And I'm quite chuffed you liked it, my dear. (:
no subject
They really are sort of obsessive types, both of them.
no subject
I love Tim's response to "Does Bruce know?" being "Are you kidding, Clark? He's the goddamn Batman!" except... tamed, because it's Clark he's talking to.
no subject
At some point in Tim's first year of training/Robining, *Alfred* totally encouraged ghim to emote more...
no subject
because honestly, the back of my mouth, that taste is even stronger now than it was when i started reading this. you know that taste, the one thats screaming: "STILL HUNGRY" at me now.
fuck.
"I... I believe I'll need time to consider. But... well. Everything about Robins *interests* me, Superman."
this? totally made me EEEEEE in my head.
Perfect Tim.
also when Redbird got wrecked later, i honestly expected a Case. Tim's love was so *pure*.