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buggeryYes, you read that right.
Jenn: I'm writing pong smut.
Jack: ...pong?
V: pong?
Jack: the video game?
Jenn: Yeah.
P: do the paddles have sex?
Jenn: It's very subtextual.
Jenn: The ball flings itself across the screen, anticipating and fearing the next violent smack with a mixture of pain/pleasure that can't really be put into words.
Jack: paddles, eh? sounds spanktastic
Jenn: Faster and faster, each slap more violent than the last, the ball's dizzy, unable to do anything but react to every slap.
Jenn: I'm mulling ff.net having minesweeper fanfic.
Jenn: I'm thinking this could be extended toward such things as Solitaire and pong.
V: q-bert
P: snood.
V: there should definitely be some q-bert smut around
Jack: pac-man was so slashy.
Jack: and frogger was a masochist.
V: *nod* the purple ghost was just a beard
Jack: ms pac-man was such a dyke.
D: i think mrs. pacman was the beard
P: hee.
Jack: mario bros. twisted incest donkeykongfucking wrongness
V: *chokes*
P: and Bowser, too.
Jenn: *smiles*
Jenn: You all make me so happy.
D: and zelda. zelda was a fairy.
Mario pressed his face against the rung of the ladder with every thrust. Mustache bristle roughened every kiss and lick and bite at the back of his neck.
"The barrel, Luigi," he gasped. "The barrel, the barrel..."
Overhead, Kong roared.
"Alla-most there, fratellini, alla-most..." Luigi huffed against his shoulder, speeding his strokes and reaching around to pump Mario's cock.
"No, Luigi, it's a-coming, Luigi, stop--!"
Luigi pulled out, but it was too late. Mario clung to the ladder's side rails, legs pulled up, watching in horror as his brother fell under the burning barrel and was knocked from the scaffolding, plunging four stories down.
He was too close to the edge to mourn now, though. Hitching up his overalls, he climbed the rest of the way up the ladder. There was a barrel up here waiting for him, and he leapt over it, wincing at the protesting muscles in his thighs and the twinge in his ass. One more level... the nearest ladder was missing a rung, so he had to detour back a bit. The coarse fabric of his overalls shifted maddeningly against his erection with every movement.
At the top, the shrill screams were more annoying than ever. "Toss a barrel on atop o'her, alla-ready," he growled, letting his overalls slip all the way down, "and come finish me."
He'd barely gotten down to his hands and knees on the unforgiving metal plating before Kong was on him, so much bigger and hairier than his brother, pawing at his thighs and buttocks. At the first push in -- much bigger -- his wail rose to join with the improbable princess's, and then he cried out, "Luigiii!" when Kong thrust again, coming so hard he thought it might kill him. The grunting behind him didn't stop for long, jarring minutes.
Related reading: Super Mario Brothers: Hit 80's Video Game, or Subtle Communist Propaganda?
nothing else here is half so wrong, honest
Jenn: I'm writing pong smut.
Jack: ...pong?
V: pong?
Jack: the video game?
Jenn: Yeah.
P: do the paddles have sex?
Jenn: It's very subtextual.
Jenn: The ball flings itself across the screen, anticipating and fearing the next violent smack with a mixture of pain/pleasure that can't really be put into words.
Jack: paddles, eh? sounds spanktastic
Jenn: Faster and faster, each slap more violent than the last, the ball's dizzy, unable to do anything but react to every slap.
Jenn: I'm mulling ff.net having minesweeper fanfic.
Jenn: I'm thinking this could be extended toward such things as Solitaire and pong.
V: q-bert
P: snood.
V: there should definitely be some q-bert smut around
Jack: pac-man was so slashy.
Jack: and frogger was a masochist.
V: *nod* the purple ghost was just a beard
Jack: ms pac-man was such a dyke.
D: i think mrs. pacman was the beard
P: hee.
Jack: mario bros. twisted incest donkeykongfucking wrongness
V: *chokes*
P: and Bowser, too.
Jenn: *smiles*
Jenn: You all make me so happy.
D: and zelda. zelda was a fairy.
Mario pressed his face against the rung of the ladder with every thrust. Mustache bristle roughened every kiss and lick and bite at the back of his neck.
"The barrel, Luigi," he gasped. "The barrel, the barrel..."
Overhead, Kong roared.
"Alla-most there, fratellini, alla-most..." Luigi huffed against his shoulder, speeding his strokes and reaching around to pump Mario's cock.
"No, Luigi, it's a-coming, Luigi, stop--!"
Luigi pulled out, but it was too late. Mario clung to the ladder's side rails, legs pulled up, watching in horror as his brother fell under the burning barrel and was knocked from the scaffolding, plunging four stories down.
He was too close to the edge to mourn now, though. Hitching up his overalls, he climbed the rest of the way up the ladder. There was a barrel up here waiting for him, and he leapt over it, wincing at the protesting muscles in his thighs and the twinge in his ass. One more level... the nearest ladder was missing a rung, so he had to detour back a bit. The coarse fabric of his overalls shifted maddeningly against his erection with every movement.
At the top, the shrill screams were more annoying than ever. "Toss a barrel on atop o'her, alla-ready," he growled, letting his overalls slip all the way down, "and come finish me."
He'd barely gotten down to his hands and knees on the unforgiving metal plating before Kong was on him, so much bigger and hairier than his brother, pawing at his thighs and buttocks. At the first push in -- much bigger -- his wail rose to join with the improbable princess's, and then he cried out, "Luigiii!" when Kong thrust again, coming so hard he thought it might kill him. The grunting behind him didn't stop for long, jarring minutes.
Related reading: Super Mario Brothers: Hit 80's Video Game, or Subtle Communist Propaganda?
nothing else here is half so wrong, honest
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no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 07:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 09:01 am (UTC)Oh. My. GOD. When I tell you that I originally read your title as 'Donkey-fucking-wrongness' and was appropriately startled, but that the actual fiction was even more off the wall (not to mention very, VERY much funnier)...well, I think that says it all. Bless you, my child. And all who sail in you.
HEEE!!!
Date: 2002-11-12 09:44 am (UTC)need... to... breathe...
so... much... wrong...
no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 12:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 12:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-11-12 04:08 pm (UTC)*whimper* I don't think I've ever been so traumatized. Or laughed so hard. Take your pick. *g*
no subject
Date: 2002-11-13 03:41 am (UTC)This is wrong on so many levels. Well done.
no subject
Date: 2004-04-26 08:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-31 09:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-01 01:13 am (UTC)